Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Dear Tracey Ann...

Dear Tracey Ann,

Your daddy and I looked back at pictures of you from when you were first born last night, and we cannot believe how much you have changed, and how much you have changed us in less than three months time.  You were the tiniest little newborn... and now you are a beautiful, smiling, plump infant.  Where have these 11 weeks gone?

Tracey Ann 1 hour old
Tracey Ann 2 months old
I am sure, before I know it, I will be teaching you Colossians 3:23-24,
"Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance form the Lord as a reward.  It i the Lord Chris you are serving."  I know, as your mother, I need to set a Godly example through my actions... and that doesn't start when you're 3 or 5 or 13 or 18... it started long before you were even conceived.  It is on me to live a Godly example in the hopes that you, too, will delight in following Biblical teachings.

This verse is very strongly on my heart this week because, this is the week I go back to work after 11 glorious, blessed weeks of maternity leave.  The only place in the world I want to be is home devoting my time and energy to caring for you and your daddy, my hubby.  My highest priority is you... and yet, my calling for the next 7 weeks is to return to work, teach my students, and finish the school year.

From the very beginning of my pregnancy with you, Tracey Ann, there have been PLENTY of difficult stretches -- less than a week after Daddy and I found out you were on your way, I went off to Greeley, Colorado, without your dad, for a month of a blindfold graduate class.  Not long after that ended, when my first-trimester un-pleasantries were at a high, I spent 3 weeks, away from your dad, working in 100*+ temperatures in Tucson, Arizona.  Finally, I spent another stretch of time away from your daddy that fall, when I finished my studies in Austin, Texas.  All of those seasons were incredibly difficult -- but I think these next seven weeks will rival all of those in difficulty.

You grandparents will be arriving soon to be your full-time daycare, which will be so special for your relationship with them.  After that, your other grandparents are taking over for a little while.  Then, it will almost be the end of the year.  You will be very well-loved and well cared for these next seven weeks... but... despite the perfect arrangements we have made... the arrangements are not perfect, because I am not the one caring for you.

Tracey Ann 10 days old
Tracey Ann 11 weeks old
Did you know, I have not been away from you for longer than 60 minutes for the past 11 weeks?  And even the quick errands I have run without you add up to approximately less than 10 hours.  You have become my little side-kick.  You are always with me.  There is a reason my body responds when I haven't held you for a few hours (speaking of my milk coming in).  My body knows how often you need me, and how often we are supposed to be joined.

Okay, its time to wrap up this letter before my tears get bigger -- you, Tracey Ann, are going to grow up to be a very strong woman.  Sometimes you will have to do things that you do not want to do... but remember Colossians 3:23-24.  Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord.

That is the example I am going to try to set for you in my work for the next seven weeks.

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