No Idea

I haven't written in a few days, which I don't particularly like to do -- I like to post SOMETHING every day, even if its silly or simple.  Also, I have to be careful about the blog going quiet for a few days because I'm to the point where people could possibly think that my silence is because our twins have arrived... and that isn't the case (yet).

We've just had a busy, enjoyable, Christmas-filled few days and at the end of the day (which is when I write the next day's blog post), I have been exhausted and writing a blog has slipped my mind.  No major news, no major reason for the days off... just enjoying these days before Christmas, and before the twins arrive with my wonderful family (Hubby, Tracey Ann, and my parents).

There is a post I have wanted to write for a few weeks now, but I have hesitated because I don't want to in any way imply that I am unhappy being pregnancy with our twins.  I feel incredibly blessed that we are expecting two babies, and it is a tremendous answer to prayer that they babies are still in utero.

I am not ready to be done with the pregnancy.  I am not asking the doctor to induce as soon as possible.  I am not angry at my husband for "doing this to me," as sitcoms and comedies make a habit of implying.  I am doing very well and I remain incredibly grateful for the blessing of carrying and expecting these twins.

All of that being said, I do want to write this post, not only to inform you, but to help myself remember in the future, that unless you yourself have carried twins, you have NO IDEA what this feels like.

I have now said this to both Hubby and my mother now a few times... and I don't say it in an accusing way, but I find it very amusing that seriously, both of them have No Idea what I am experiencing right now.

Now, I know women experience pregnancy differently, and some women who carry one child have major complications, aches, and pains, and a very rough experience... so I do not know if that is comparable to this, but I certainly can say there are things I am experiencing with this pregnancy, and have been experiencing for months that I NEVER experienced carrying one child -- even in the very last weeks of pregnancy.

• It is very strange to begin to change Tracey Ann's diaper after a two or three hour period of time to find the her diaper is dry.  I, meanwhile, I have used the restroom upwards of 5 times during that same time frame.  I officially have a bladder smaller than a not-yet-two-year-old.
• Picking things up off the floor is a real hardship.  I don't want to think of myself as a lazy person, but sometimes I have to consciously stop myself from cursing when I drop something on the floor because it is so difficult and uncomfortable to retrieve.
• My stomach is so large that the process of putting on socks, or shoes, or nylons has become a time-consuming exercise in being a contortionist, but also has me wondering on a daily basis if that is going to be the action that causes my water to break.
• I have to use the restroom all. the. time.  I emphasize all the time, because I don't think you understand what's going on here.  Whenever I change positions, no matter how little time has passed, I have to use the restroom.  I will use the restroom at home, get in the car and drive 1 mile to work, and as soon as I get out of the car and walk into the school, the first thing I will have to do is use the restroom again.
• The babies appreciate an empty bladder -- they often move around more following my using the restroom... I think they appreciate any extra space they can get.
• It is very difficult to lean over into a car and reach something -- like when you get out of a car, but then reach back in to grab your purse or bottle of water... yeah, my stomach gets squashed and my back gives out when I do that.
• You can seem my entire stomach rolling, jiggling, and poking in and out when the twins are moving.  It is the coolest thing and truly one of my favorite parts of carrying twins.
• While nice soft reclining chairs look comfortable, for me, right now, the more support a chair has, the more comfortable I am.  I will take a boring, hard, sturdy card-table chair over a recliner any day!  Of course, this is the time, when very well-meaning, considerate people are selflessly offering me the very soft, comfortable seats, and I have to graciously refuse in favor of a hard-backed chair.
• Simply moving is very difficult.  I have always tried to keep in good physical shape and enjoy a variety of exercise routines, and so that fact that simply moving has become incredibly difficult is a very hard fact for me to accept.  There are times when my feet are elevated, but I want to put them on the ground to get up or reposition myself... and it will take me several attempts and careful planning in order to do so
• I get short-of breath doing just about anything.  Thankfully, my breathing, thus far, always returns to normal when I stop and allow myself to catch my breath, but -- I get short of breath carrying on a conversation, walking, interacting with Tracey Ann, trying to get out of bed, and more.
• Most of my maternity clothes do not really fit right now.
• In the morning, when I think about my day, I used to try to have a plan for what I could accomplish with Tracey Ann, and then how I would productively use her naptime to accomplish other projects without her.  Then, after her nap, we might go outside and play together until dinner.  Now, I might have one project I can accomplish in the course of two or three days, with the help of my parents and/or Hubby, and when Tracey Ann is napping, I have to be napping and/or off my feet during that time otherwise, I will not be in a good state to finish the evening with the family.
• While a shower or bath are still relaxing for me, they also now take twice to three times as long as they ever did, and I'm exhausted at the end.

 

 Again, I do not mean to, IN ANY WAY imply that I am not incredibly grateful for this pregnancy and how well it is going, and how much I am able to still do while carrying the twins, and more... but the truth is, most people have no idea what this feels like... and I know I will blissfully forget many of these things once our two little blessings arrive.  So, for your general education along with my own prosperity sake, please understand the spirit behind this post as informative and not complaining.