Last Sunday in church, our Pastor touched on Christians being persecuted around the world. He talked about these Christians who are staying true to their faith in the face of death and singing hymns while becoming martyrs.
He stated that if he were to ask us, the congregation, what is most important to us, most of us would answer, "Our family," but are we really in a place to say that our faith is the most important thing to us, and our family is second to that?
His message really struck a cord with me and unsettled me this week. Ever since I was in high school, I have always hoped I wouldn't be called to die for my faith, but I didn't wonder what I would do if I was in that scenario. While I hoped the situation would NEVER present itself, I felt that, at that hour, God would give me the strength to stay true and stand firm in my faith.
When our Pastor began to talk about family, I found myself unsettled with the question, not because I now value my life more than my faith... but wondering if I value my daughter's life more than my faith.
Once I began to give some earnest thought and prayer to the absolutely horrible and unpleasant idea of whether I would surrender my daughter's life for my faith... I realized that God was uncovering a bigger issue in my faith regarding His plans for her life compared to my plans for her life.
What God revealed to me was the realization that I really do need to surrender her life to Him and trust Him with her life.
I have been praying since before Tracey Ann was born that she would grown in wisdom and favor with God, that she would learn to love Jesus and follow His teaching, and that God would do mighty works through my daughter. But if I'm really honest with myself, I have a very specific picture in my mind of what all those things look like -- she is a beautiful, healthy, joyful, vivacious young lady, living in a very safe neighborhood, with a insatiable love and heart for God. What if God does do mighty works through my daughter, but it doesn't follow my picture of her being healthy or living in a safe neighborhood?
I can't entrust Tracey Ann's life to God only when God follows my expectations... if I am praying that Tracey Ann learns to love God, and God uses Tracey Ann, I have to trust Him and His Will, whatever that may be.
"As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts." Isaiah 55:9
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:5-6
He stated that if he were to ask us, the congregation, what is most important to us, most of us would answer, "Our family," but are we really in a place to say that our faith is the most important thing to us, and our family is second to that?
His message really struck a cord with me and unsettled me this week. Ever since I was in high school, I have always hoped I wouldn't be called to die for my faith, but I didn't wonder what I would do if I was in that scenario. While I hoped the situation would NEVER present itself, I felt that, at that hour, God would give me the strength to stay true and stand firm in my faith.
When our Pastor began to talk about family, I found myself unsettled with the question, not because I now value my life more than my faith... but wondering if I value my daughter's life more than my faith.
Once I began to give some earnest thought and prayer to the absolutely horrible and unpleasant idea of whether I would surrender my daughter's life for my faith... I realized that God was uncovering a bigger issue in my faith regarding His plans for her life compared to my plans for her life.
What God revealed to me was the realization that I really do need to surrender her life to Him and trust Him with her life.
I have been praying since before Tracey Ann was born that she would grown in wisdom and favor with God, that she would learn to love Jesus and follow His teaching, and that God would do mighty works through my daughter. But if I'm really honest with myself, I have a very specific picture in my mind of what all those things look like -- she is a beautiful, healthy, joyful, vivacious young lady, living in a very safe neighborhood, with a insatiable love and heart for God. What if God does do mighty works through my daughter, but it doesn't follow my picture of her being healthy or living in a safe neighborhood?
I can't entrust Tracey Ann's life to God only when God follows my expectations... if I am praying that Tracey Ann learns to love God, and God uses Tracey Ann, I have to trust Him and His Will, whatever that may be.
"As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts." Isaiah 55:9
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:5-6
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