Saturday, May 19, 2018

Time

I think I'm getting wiser as I get older... but the fact that I just typed that probably indicates just how immature, inexperienced, and unwise I actually am.

That having been said, I really am learning, little by little, the value of time.  Okay, that's a really intense topic... I'm not sure anyone can truly learn the VALUE of time.  Time is one of God's greatest gifts, but it is also unreliable.  You never know when your time with something, your time somewhere, your time with someone, your time on earth will be over.  Time cannot be bottled, it cannot be bought, it cannot be stored, it cannot be saved.  It can be spent, it can be cherished... but it is always fleeting.

Yeah, there is no way I, with my minuscule human brain can actually understand and appreciate the VALUE of time. 

What I have learned is how calming time is -- yes, that is what I want to say.

Three or four weeks ago I started what would become two totally separate, but simultaneous crazy and demanding situations at work.  They involved two new students in two different districts with two different sets of teachers in two different schools with no experience with a student with visual impairments in two very unique situations.  

Each one on its own would have been one of the biggest challenges of my career thus far.  But four weeks ago, I got them both dropped into my lap simultaneously.  Each of these situations on their own would have been a tremendous workload for me if I worked full time... but I was trying to handle both while working part-time and taking care of my children, and keeping our home running smoothly and handling all the normal end-of-the-year activities.

I remember several mornings on the verge of tears during my morning workouts because I was so distraught over these situations.

Time is such a gift.

Four weeks later, I still do not have all the plans or answers, and all of the challenges are not solved... but things are going to be okay.

I have handled these situations one step at a time, one challenge at a time, and checked things off my list as I am able.  I still am uncertain and a little distraught about what the future holds and how these circumstances will resolve... but I'm not losing sleep over them and I'm not crying through morning workouts anymore.  Things will be okay.

It reminds me of times early in our relationship and marriage where I laugh now because Hubby and I had the stupidest arguments.  I remember one of our biggest fights was in an IKEA store.  I don't like IKEA stores and Hubby loves them.  I like my home, rooms, furniture to be more unique than a set that I can pluck off an assembly line.  Hubby, on the other hand had so much fun pointing out his different favorite fantasy kitchens.  We had the biggest argument over the fictitious decisions as to how to decorate our non-existent home long before we were even engaged.

Sometimes Hubby will say something about a plan in the future... and I've learned to say, "Sure, maybe," "Sounds like a plan," "We'll see," and "Whatever you think, Babe.
These are all my way of saying, "We will talk about that at length and in extreme detail should that situation ever actually present itself, but it is not worth arguing about *ahem... I mean* discussing at the present time.

Most of the scenarios (or furniture patterns) that we talk about never actually happen or are years down the line.  Even if they are days or weeks down the line, a little time to think things over is so valuable before discussing something big and tackling a challenge together.

Time is such a precious and beautiful gift.


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