Saturday, June 17, 2017

Molding Character

We're going through a new phase with Tracey right now and its tricky because she will always be our oldest and so every new phase she goes through, it is a brand new phase for Hubby and me as well.

Lately we've just been dealing with a little defiance on her part and its been a hard phase, I think especially for me in adjusting to it.  She's certainly acting like a normal three-year-old, but two weeks ago, our normal three-year-old loved to please us and loved to help... and now she is testing the limits in a way she has never done before.

It is during situations like this when it sinks in to me that Hubby and I are responsible for molding and shaping and training the characters of our children... and how in the world do you prepare for that?  Where's the manual for molding another human's character, much less three humans and counting?  Its not like Tracey can be our rough draft practice run on molding character so that we knock out all the kinks with her in order to do better with the rest... everything we do as parents plays a role in her childhood and can potentially impact the rest of her life.  That's really heavy.

This week, Hubby and I have had to reinforce and recommit to the house rules and dish out consequences when they are warranted and positive reinforcement when it is earned.  We've been having to reiterate and reteach lessons this week spanning from being kind to our siblings, to not being disrespectful to Mama and Daddy, to the importance of telling the truth, to obeying Mama and Daddy when asked to do something (preferably the first time she's asked) -- those are really big life lessons and here we are trying to teach our three year old (well, and our one-year-olds) these lessons -- no wonder its been a tough week, those are major life lessons with which some adults still struggle.

It certainly can be frustrating to me when it feels like Tracey is deliberately disobeying me, but when I am able (occasionally) to step back and see the big picture of how we are working to mold her character it certainly makes sense that these lessons would not be learned overnight and need to be reinforced, in a variety of ways many times a day... for many years to come.


  1. The manual is Scripture and the help is the Holy Spirit. Of course you know this as these lessons we need to teach (and learn) are the same lessons the Lord has given us in His Word. Line upon line, precept upon precept.... It truly is a daily (moment by moment) task as we live before our children. May you know His help each step of the way. I enjoy reading your blog -- found it a few years ago from Kelly's (joyfuladorations).

  2. Oh man, I completely understand your post! We are in that phase with Levi and, man, it's tough. All e can do is pray and stay consistent. We are talking to him a lot about what it means to obey and to be respectful...trying to help him understand. Praying for you guys! I know you are doing your best by Tracey, and that's all that matters. She will grow up to be a great woman and role model some day! She's got some of the best to look up to!


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