Can I Just Say...

Sometimes I get tired of pretending... sometimes I just want to call a spade a spade.

Can I just say... ever since Tracey Ann arrived, 13.5 months ago, I have been craving sugar like never before.  Apparently it is normal to crave sugar and fatty foods while nursing -- although experts seem to be split as to whether a mother craves sugar and fats due to nursing or do to sleep deprivation, but it is normal to have these cravings.

However, I had a sweet tooth BEFORE postpartum life.  I ALREADY struggled with sugar cravings, and can I just say, I am SOOOO tired of wanting sugar.

I am so tired of fighting the urge to eat sugar at every meal.

Yes, I admit it -- my body (and my mind) wants sugar at every meal.

Add to that the fact that excess sugar is added to so many processed American foods... Add to that, we are in the middle of March, which is always a hard month for me...
Add to that, I am six days away from Spring Break, and ABSOLUTELY EXHAUSTED...

I am craving sugar ALL. THE. TIME.

Hopefully I will have a follow-up post about how I am over-coming my desire for sugar... but for today, I just have to admit how difficult this is.

Culture Clash

I often joke about not really fitting in to Rifle... but its not a joke.  I really do not fit in to Rifle.

In many ways, I don't think I fit in to Colorado in general.  It has helped that I married a hunter, gunman, and fisherman... but Colorado is a laid back place, and I'm not a laid back person.

I don't want to fit on the East Coast, but the wardrobe, the schedule, and the courtesy is very appealing to me.  Maybe I fit best in the South, but the heat and humidity sends me running for the hills.  The Midwest is nice... a little more relaxed than the East, but more courteous and cultured than the West.  Maybe the Midwest my answer.

I attended Washington and Lee University (W&L) for undergrad, and Vanderbilt University for graduate school.  At both of these places, students wear coat and tie (and female equivalent) to football games.  I am still wondering if anyone is Rifle OWNS a coat and tie!?!?

Oscar Wilde said,
"You Can Never Be Overdressed or Over Educated."
It is kind of the unofficial motto of W&L, and I LOVE it! 
It is definitely NOT the motto of Colorado.

My Dad always said,
"By dressing up, you bring dignity to the occasion."
The opposite of that is, if you don't dress up, you don't think the occasion is worth your nicer clothes.

Last fall, I threw a baby shower for a friend and I had SEVERAL people show up (to the sit-down lunch) who did not RSVP (like 5 people!).  And just about every guest came in jeans.  This is just not my world.
I know these woman meant no offense by dressing in jeans and I'm sure the whole RSVP thing just slipped their minds... but I just DON'T UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD!

• Where I come from, people RSVP to a party/shower/event because they know the person hosting is trying to plan for the appropriate number of guests.
• Where I come from, people dress nicely for showers.  We're celebrating the mother-to-be (or bride-to-be)... is it so much to ask that you come in something other than jeans?
• Where I come from, people can wear pearls with any outfit.
• Where I come from, you either wear a sundress, or team apparel to a football game
• Where I come from, you dress professionally (no jeans, no khakis) to go to work.
• Where I come from, you dress nicer for church than the clothes you wear to work... so whatever you wear to work, you wear something nicer to church.
• Where I come from, stores sell Place Cards because people actually use them at parties.
• Where I come, posting a blog about my standard for manners is probably considered impolite... but what can I say, I've been in Colorado for awhile now.  I guess my manners are suffering.

A Year Away

I don't want to wish my life away AT ALL!

I have never been one of those people just waiting for my life to begin.  I was never thinking that "as soon as..."
"As soon as I go to college..."
"As soon as I'm done with college..."
"As soon as I get a job..."
"As soon as I get married..."
"As soon as we buy a house..."
"As soon as we have a baby..."

I have never thought about my life as the exciting part just around the corner.

My life is now.

When students think of their life "finally starting" when they leave home, they're mistaken.  If, Lord forbid, something happened to this kid before he left home, he still would have had a life.  His life doesn't BEGIN when he leaves home, his life enters a new chapter when he leaves home.  His live is going on NOW.

I have always TRIED to treasure the stage of life where I am... I emphasize tried because it has not always been easy.  Sometimes I needed to be creative in order to find things to be grateful about for my current stage of life, but I always knew, and, to this day, KNOW, My Life Is NOW.

That being said, I am not looking forward to this next year, which is so ironic because 13 is my lucky number... and this year is 2013.

I am returning to grad school this year and I will be accelerating the program so as to complete all the requirements in one calendar year.  That means that by next Christmas (2013), I REALLY REALLY HOPE and PLAN to be finished.

To be honest, I am not excited to earn this degree... I am excited to HAVE this degree and FINISH this degree.  I want to HAVE EARNED the degree, not about to begin earning this degree.  Which means, I wish it was 1 year from now -- and I really DO NOT want to feel this way.

The problem is, when I think of 2013, ALL I think about is the parts of this degree.
Winter/Spring 2013, I will be juggling my regular difficult work load and traveling AND completing an on-line class.
June 2013, I will be living in Greeley, Colorado (in all likelihood, away from my husband and animals) to take an on-campus class.
July 2013, I will spend 3 weeks doing practicum work somewhere in the country (hopefully the mid-west)
August 2013, I will spend 3 weeks doing practicum work somewhere in the country (hopefully in the mid-west)
Fall 2013, I will be tying all the loose ends of the degree, working at my regular job, and spending 3 more weeks doing practicum work, having to take time away from my job, and living away from my husband and animals.

The entire program leaves me with possibly, POSSIBLY two weeks of vacation in the entire 2013 year (this, from a teacher who REALLY looks forward to, and benefits from her 8 week summer break!).  Two weeks to try to see Chris' family and my family and two weeks to somewhat recover from the year and gather the strength to keep on going.

When I look ahead at 2013, I see exhaustion, logistical head-aches, deadlines, and yes, a light at the end of the tunnel... but the light at the end of the tunnel is the end of 2013.

The ONE thing I Am REALLY REALLY looking forward to in 2013 is...

Chris and I are going to be an Aunt and Uncle on his side of the family!!!!

Chris' little sister and brother-in-law, Becky and Daniel, are expecting a baby in July and this will be the FIRST grandchild on the Miller side of the family.  Everyone is SOOO excited and we are really close to Chris' siblings so it is going to be so much fun to have a new baby in the family... and watch them handle a first-baby... before we have to handle a first-baby.

 We had so much fun shopping for Becky and Daniel for Christmas.  We bought Becky the Cardinal fan maternity shirt in the picture above, and we bought Daniel baby fireman pajamas... because Daniel is a fire-fighter, and their baby will have to be appropriately appareled!

 So, there's the truth about when I think about the year... I am not excited -- except for the new family baby.  But when I think about my year, I am not excited.  I am a little overwhelmed and very tired... and I wish it was a year from now.

Many bloggers pray about "words" for the year and they hold to that word for direction and the way they feel God is teaching them that year.  My human word for 2013 is NO, or TIRED, or STUDY, or DO I HAVE TO?... the word I keep coming back to in prayer for 2013 is FAITH.

Faith that I am meant to earn this degree.
Faith that I can do what is asked of me.

But I don't have Faith that I will enjoy it.
I don't have Faith that there are fun times ahead in 2013.
I don't have Faith that any rest will exist in 2013.
I have Faith there is work ahead in 2013.

Thanks for listening.

When you look ahead at 2013, what do you see?

Cooking Confessions...

This might be completely and 100% accurate...
either dog or cat hair... or both...
but there's lots of love in it too!

Just a little extra protein... right?

Out of Sorts

Yesterday, I was just out of sorts.  Do you ever have a day when you're just out of sorts?  I do and yesterday was one.

I told myself all day how fortunate I was and how the things that were irritating me were blessings and NOT IRRITATING at all in the big scheme of life, and when I consider the REAL problems in this world, and I prayed that the Lord would change my heart to one of gratitude instead of cantankerous... unfortunately, I remained moody and irritable.

I was simply out of sorts.  The below book could be called "Brookie and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day" today...

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I went to PINTEREST and searched "Bad Mood" and "Bad Day" and didn't get any matches that actually fit Bad Mood or Bad Day -- I got matches with picture captions like "Mood Boards" and "I want this so bad", but nothing regarding a bad mood or bad day... or even to get out of a bad mood or bad day.  I think the answer here is that people don't come to Pinterest in a bad mood... 

On Pinterest, this picture had me laughing pretty hard...

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In an effort to put mind over matter and kick this crabby attitude, I didn't what any modern 20-something would do: I GOOGLED "How to get out of a bad mood"  The results were relatively useful and definitely amusing...

Women's Day Magazine had some fun suggestions

• Start a Blog (this suggestion made me laugh out loud as I had already begun this post when I did the Google search... guess I'm ahead of the game already)
• Put yourself in the movies (I wasn't quite sure what to do with this... they suggested that you imagine what a movie character would do... I don't know that my bad mood imagination is that good)
• Touch your toes (Dr. Oz says this relieves stress)
• Tune Up The Tunes and Show off your moves (I think these go together... guess its time to sing and dance... Good thing my hubby isn't home at the moment)
• Put photos on the fridge (Evidently, people are happier with many family photos in their home... I actually have a lot of family photos in our home, so I hate to think how moody I would be if they weren't there...)
• Create a new code (Their suggestion is to change a password on email or something to something fun... I'm pretty sure I would promptly forget that I changed the password, which would not make my day better)
• Send out good vibes (They suggest that you text three friends and tell them what you like about them... well, I did write three letters today -- you remember, the old fashioned text message/email)

All in all, some fun, if not funny suggestions... I was having fun by this point sharing suggestions and my thoughts on the suggestions, so I checked out a few more sites including Dumb Little Man -- this should be interesting:

• Fight the urge to mope (This is good advice and something I do need to fight when I'm in a bad mood...)
• Laugh (my hubby would love this advice... I just have a hard time laughing when I'm in a bad mood.  Things I usually find funny suddenly become annoying and patronizing... the Dumb Little Man did have a link to a laughing yoga video, so I felt I should try his laughing yoga technique in order to appropriately judge the suggestion -- I think I scared my cat with my crazy laughing, but I think my mood was a little better afterwards...)

• Take an Action Toward a Goal (I think this is good advice... even when I'm in my worst moods, if I can talk myself into starting just a small step of a project, I know I'm going to feel better -- just start one load of laundry, just vacuum one room -- just unload the dishwasher, I know I'm going to feel better and I'll probably be on a role and I'll keep cleaning)
• Exercise (This is great advice as well, although, I confess exercise is one of the toughest things for me to do when I'm in a bad mood)
• Treat Yourself (He suggests maybe chocolate cake or a movie... well, when I eat junk food when I'm in a bad mood, I don't really think of it as "Treating Myself" so much as I think of my trying to find comfort in food -- which is a bad habit, so I don't agree with this advice -- I don't think I should reward myself for being in a bad mood)

Well, that's the skinny for today... my opinion on a few suggestions to change your mood.  But I have to say, I think the very first suggestion "Start a Blog" may be one of the best... because, at the end of this blog post, I'm feeling better.

I think the bottom line of the entire post, and the entire point of getting out of a bad mood is well summed in this picture from PINTEREST

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Thanks, y'all.  :-D

More Than A Little Addictive

Last weekend, my amazing hubby took me to Denver for the weekend to celebrate my 28th birthday -- wow, 10 years ago, I became eligible to vote!

The ENTIRE weekend was amazing and reminded me of trips my parents and I used to do to big cities like Chicago and New York.  Although the activities varied, the schedule was the same: in the morning we'd do sight-seeing events, tours, shopping, etc.; we'd return to the hotel in the afternoon for a nap and to freshen up; then we'd get all dressed up for a fancy dinner, theater production or other activity in the evening -- What great times!

Last weekend one of our fancy evening activities was BRING IT ON: The Musical.

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My hubby had given me a couple of options for our Saturday evening plans and I had expressed to him how much I wanted to go see this Broadway Tour.  Now, let me clarify, I did not know any of the music from this musical, nor had I heard from a friend that it was a "must see", and I certainly was not trying to relive memories of Competitive Cheerleading Glory (there are no such memories for me)... rather, it has been years since I've seen a Broadway calibre musical production.

As a child, I had a great love for musicals of all kinds... and once I saw one, I would promptly memorize all the music I had just heard and proceed to sing the songs around the house until my parents took me to a new musical, the songs from which would take the place of the old one.  I could never remember all of the live shows and musicals I saw during the fifteen years of my ages 7-22, but off the top of my head, they include the following:

• Annie
• Annie Warbucks (the sequel to Annie)
• Fiddler On The Roof
• Evita
• Harvey
• South Pacific
• Chess
• Wizard of Oz
• West Side Story
• Cinderella
• Little Shop of Horrors
• Oklahoma
• Annie Get Your Gun
• Anything Goes
• Damn Yankees
• Secret Garden
• Miss Saigon
• Madame Butterfly
• La Traviata
• Fidelio
• Grease
• Hello Dolly!
• Man of La Mancha
• Hair
• Pirates of Penzance
• The Music Man
• Oliver!
• Stomp
• The King and I
• State Fair
• Guys and Dolls
• Once On this Island
• Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dream Coat
•  Jesus Christ Superstar  

  The following shows, I have seen on Broadway or performed by Broadway touring groups (AKA, I've seen AMAZING productions of the following shows):  

• Ragtime
• The Sound of Music
• Lion King
• Beauty and the Beast
• Phantom of the Opera
• Annie Get Your Gun
• Spamalot
•  WICKED

Since I left Nashville (which is coming up on three years ago), the live musicals I have seen are limited to community theater and the local high schools.  These productions are great, and I love seeing amateur performers enjoy their hobby on stage and I really appreciate their effort, passion and dedication... but those musicals are NOTHING compared to a Broadway calibre show.

So, I told Chris that I would prefer to see BRING IT ON: The Musical.  He was ANYTHING but thrilled about watching an evening of singing, dancing and, of all things, cheerleading (he had never even seen the original BRING IT ON movie), but he was a great sport and it was my birthday, so he decided to grin and bear it.

Broadway musicals are phenomenal!  Broadway musicals are so phenomenal, in fact, that I have a strong theory that it doesn't matter WHAT a musical is about (with the exception of something offensive or profane), anyone will love any Broadway musical.  The singing, the dancing, the characters, the choreography... the plot is really secondary to the SPECTACLE and TALENT of a Broadway musical.

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All that to say, Chris had an absolute BLAST and he was completely BLOWN AWAY by the production.  He has been recommending it to basically everyone who has asked about our weekend.  Again, a story about Competitive Cheerleading -- not worth recommending... the Broadway Tour of BRING IT ON: The Musical -- TOTALLY WORTH SEEING!

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In the case of BRING IT ON: The Musical, not only was the music, dancing and acrobatics UNBELIEVABLE, but the genre of the show is a musical comedy and it was hysterical!  It was the most modern musical I've ever seen with screens creating digital scene changes instead of old fashioned backdrops, and with jokes about facebook, twitter and youtube.  (It was also awesome that the female star is a University of Michigan student!)

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I've always known I've loved musicals... what I didn't know is that my seeing a Broadway Musical for the first time in six years would be like an addict taking their first hit of something in six years -- I NEED MORE!!!!  I LOVE professional musicals and Denver has quite a few coming through in 2012 including but not limited to:

• I Love You, You're Perfect, Now Change 
• Beauty and the Beast 
• WICKED 
• The Adams Family 
• The Book of Mormon 
• Jersey Boys 
• Memphis 
• Ring of Fire: The Music of Johnny Cash

I want to see SOOO MANY!  Of all of them, however, I REALLY want to take Chris to Beauty and the Beast and WICKED -- both of which I've seen, and both of which, I firmly believe, I could never see too many times (especially WICKED!)!

So, what's all the fuss about?
Check out this preview, and then go see for yourself:

Bah Humbug

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 For the first time in my life, I have absolutely no interest in Christmas preparations.  Something is COMPLETELY wrong with this scenario as I am usually MISS CHRISTMAS.  Maybe, therein lies the problem -- I am no longer MISS anything... I'm Mrs... and apparently I am NOT Mrs. Christmas.

Now, in a normal home, it would be no cause for concern if the family decorator is not ready for Christmas on December 1st... the family decorator might even get a pat on the back for giving Thanksgiving its full due, and delaying the Christmas crazy a tad.  But our home is not the normal home -- we are both teachers and we are headed for a split Christmas celebration in St. Louis and Michigan starting December 16th.  We have three weeks to enjoy a Christmas-filled home and then we're gone.

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 We have three weeks and only three weeks to have Christmas fill our home... and over half of the first week is gone.

I have no desire to even think about anything Christmas-related.  I don't know if I just burnt myself out getting the house reading for Thanksgiving, of if the lack of snow in Rifle is having a muddy effect on me or if I've just had 27 years of Christmas excitement, and this is a year off, but I don't even want to think about it.  WHAT IS GOING ON?

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 The irony is that for the past 5 years, I have decorated a home for myself -- I have not had a husband or a family for whom I was decorating; nevertheless, I decorated EVERY YEAR.  Now, I have a husband and a family (animal family) for whom I can decorate -- and I have no interest.  Something is seriously wrong here, and I have no idea what it is.

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 Have you ever had a holiday arrive and you had a completely uncharacteristic response to its arrival?

Confessions of Reality TV

Confession time...

For whatever reason, I think Tori Spelling is adorable!

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What has prompted this soul-bearing confession?  Tori and Dean: Home Sweet Hollywood the new season premiered last night and I just have to admit it... I have NO IDEA WHY, but I really like watching Tori Spelling and her family.

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 There is no logical explanation for this -- I never followed the career of her dad, Aaron Spelling, I have never seen a full episode of Beverly Hills 90210 -- I did love the Tori Spelling Saved By The Bell episodes, but I have to admit it is only in the last 3 years, I realized it was Tori who played Violette Bickerstaff.

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 Last night, the channel aired previous episodes of Tori and Dean leading up to the new season's premier, and I further have to confess that now that I'm married, I love the show even more.  I have such a better appreciation for Tori and Dean's marital dynamics... and I think there are things I can learn from them.

The crazy thing is, I could probably list on one hand the number of things I have in common with Tori Spelling, but ever since grad school in Nashville, I have found her -- through her reality shop (and yes, her books) to be so relatable.

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 Everyone has a guilty pleasure... and for whatever reason, Tori Spelling is one of mine.

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