The Mountain Millers

 Today is September 11th - a day that changed America.

For the first time leading up to September 11th, I tried to explain to my big kids what happened on September 11, 2001.  These have been the hardest conversations I have had with them.

My innocent, kind, sheltered, perfect (well, no... but still) children.  I had to look in their eyes and explain about the four planes that were taken over by bad men -- by terrorists.  I had to explain what the terrorists did to the first three planes, and how many people were killed and then trapped and then killed.  And then, through tears, I explained to them what happened to the fourth plane.

I told them how the passengers had learned what was happening, and how they rallied together and they said these men were not going to use this plane to kill more people.  I told how the passengers fought the terrorists...

...

 and the hope in my children's eyes as they wanted a happy ending...

"And they got away?" they asked...

"No," I had to say.  "The plane crashed in a field."

"And the people were okay?"

"No.  All the people died.  But, the plane didn't crash in to any other people.  No MORE people died besides the ones on the plane."

I don't know what I've ever told them a story before that didn't have a happy ending.  The story of these planes did not have a happy ending.

Last night, I reminded them about what happened on 9-11... my three big kids retold me the story perfectly.  All three of them remembered nearly every detail that I had told them a few weeks ago.

Then, we turned on youtube and watched some of the news footage from 20 years ago.  We watched the timeline of how the events transpired, and then we watched some patriotic tributes to September 11th and the people who died.

It was a heavy night.

They took it all in.

Tracey had a lot of questions.  She skillfully related everything I was telling her to her previous knowledge.

"It's a good thing they didn't drive the planes into the White House.  The White House is so old.  The construction was started by George Washington (the first president) and he is the only president who never got to live there.  Isn't that funny?"

She got emotional when she heard one of the last calls from a woman who told her husband to tell her children that she loved them.

Howard kept asking where the Marines were.  How many Marines were killed?  I told him that some Marines were killed at the Pentagon because that is where the Marines work who are really in charge -- like Marine Captains.  He watched and listened with solemn intensity and then he hugged me and his sisters when we started to cry.

Caroline cried.  She knew it was going to be sad but she said she wanted to learn about it.  She fetched her blanket from upstairs and some kleenex, and she stayed and learned everything that Tracey and Howard did, even though she knew it would be hard to hear.  She wanted to know if there were Mamas and babies in the buildings or on the planes.

They understood the gravity and the tragedy of September 11, 2001 as well as their childhood hearts and minds could possibly understand something so unfathomable.

Then, we turned off the TV and I set to making dinner.  And my three oldest children (who are still so very young) all sat down with crayons and paper and began making cards to give to policemen and fire fighters.