Friday, July 31, 2009

Pride and Victory

Last night the enemy was attacking me with lie after lie about my identity, my purpose on earth and my frequent failures. In the middle of a messy and tearful journal entry, I turned on the radio knowing that at least musical praise and positive radio djs would help fill my spirit with praise and combat the bombarding lies. At such a fertile and pivotal moment of my thoughts and writing, the Lord's wisdom and answers came through the dj reading a poem on the radio.

I had just written the following:

"Lord, I believe Your ways are better than my ways and Your thoughts are higher than my thoughts, but who am I? Why am I here? Has my life done anything? Am I any more than filling space?"


"My name is Pride. I am a cheater.
I cheat you of your God-given destiny...because
you demand your own way.
I cheat you of contentment...because you
'deserve better than this.'

I cheat you of knowledge...because you already
know it all.

I cheat you of healing...because you're
too full of me to forgive.

I cheat you of holiness...because you refuse to
admit when you're wrong.

I cheat you of vision...because you'd rather look
in the mirror than out a window.

I cheat you of a genuine friendship...because
nobody's going to know the real you.

I cheat you of love...because real romance
demands sacrifice.

I cheat you of greatness in heaven...because you
refuse to wash another's feet on earth.

I cheat you of God's glory...because I convince
you to seek your own.

My name is Pride. I am a cheater.

You like me because you think I'm always looking out for you.
I'm looking to make a fool of you.
God has so much for you, I admit, but don't worry...
If you stick with me
You'll never know."

This poem was read on K-LOVE radio and I immediately looked it up on the Internet and found it here, a part of Living Proof Ministries. The words spoke to me so powerfully that I re-worded a few stanzas that I particularly needed to ponder and pray about so that they are more convicting for me.

  • Because I demand my own destiny, I ignore my God-given destiny.
  • Because I believe 'I deserve better than this,' I refuse contentment.
  • Because I cannot forgive, I refuse healing.
  • Because I look at myself rather than the needs around me, I am blind to vision and purpose beyond myself.
  • Because real romance, earthly and heavenly, is work, I refuse love.
  • Because I try to promote myself, I prevent God from claiming glory from my life.

After praying over each of these heart-wrenching truths, I found the following song from my lips, heart and spirit:

"It's all about You, Jesus,
and all this is for You,
for Your glory and Your fame,

It's not about me,
as if You should do things my way;

You alone are God and I surrender

to Your Way."

I hope you are similarly blessed by this poem and revelation.

image signature
Photo borrowed from young ladies christian fellowship


  1. This is beautiful Brooke! Thank you so much for sharing the poem you heard... I needed to read that myself! It was wonderful to read that you are listening to K Love in Colorado ... I'm listening to it here in Va Beach. Makes me feel closer to you my bossom friend. I miss you...

    wish we could have tea and talk for hours...

  2. Thanks for your comment today Brooke -- it is so wonderful to knwo that we will be praying together over this issue of gossip. It is HARD here in Va Beach. It's painful to listen to these girls at my new church! I am missing chapel so much and there are days when I wish I could just go home to Lexington...


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