Saturday, May 30, 2009

An Attempt to Celebrate

This week is my last week of school. When I was a child, I never imagined that the teachers count down the days until the end of school even more so than the students do. I haven't written much about my job on this blog so far for a number of reasons... but here is my attempt to celebrate.

In an email I wrote to a friend, I explained to her that while
I'm plenty excited for school to be over, I wish I were feeling more accomplishment for getting through the months I have. I began my job in February and walked into directing a preschool program that had not had a director since September. I'm still patching up snafus left to me when I arrived, and I probably will continue to patch things until next March (a full year after I began the job).

I'm used to grad school, where I put my nose to the grindstone and crank out those last papers and they really demonstrate the knowledge and skill I've gained over the course of a semester. Now, I'm still on a school schedule, but I don't feel that same accomplishment or final demonstration of what I've learned. I feel like I'm just getting through the next five days to just get through them without much to be proud of in finishing the year. There is so much I want to do for next year, but this year I can only see what I haven't done, what was left undone in the preschool this year. I only see the battles I've avoided (because starting in February, I didn''t fight all the battles, I was very selective). I think a lot of it is because I don't have anything to compare the year to... I don't know what the preschool was like before I got there.

Several parents and colleagues have expressed to me the improvement they've noticed since I've arrived, how glad they are to have me... but I just don't feel it. I think this week I will pray this week that God would give me SOME sense of accomplishment in finishing this year. There has to be a reason to celebrate even though there is much improvement ahead.

4 comments:

  1. I'm so glad you wrote to me Brooke! I have been praying the same prayer ... that God would give you a sense of accomplishment. I have no doubt you've done so much in the few months you've been their director!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hey Sweetie,
    Don't beat yourself up - You may not see the results of your efforts in this short time span BUT you have made a difference in your school. Remember the plague you gave me for all my years in the preschool department at BSF "A hundred years from now it will not matter what my bank account was, the sort of house I lived in, or the kind of car I drove..but the world may be different because I was important in the life of a child". This applies to your work at Brush Creek also. Much love, Momma

    ReplyDelete
  3. Okay that word is suppose to be plaque not plague

    ReplyDelete
  4. You give your mom plagues? Just want to let you know we are all rooting for you! Me, Max, Obinna, etc. Not only are we rooting for you, we each have confidence in the fiery little redhead we all know as "Brookie." Here are some things you should be proud of in my life: every time I see a red flag with an "O" on it I feel a sense of aversion and hostility, even to the point that Iris' grandfather gave me a real buckeye and I almost threw it out the window on the way home. I just got this cool new app for my iPhone that lets me follow your blog from my phone! So I'm really excited to read more about your life in the mountains!

    Love,
    Nick

    ReplyDelete

Thank you for stopping by and joining the conversation.